dreams

6 april 2021, tuesday morning there were a lot of events that i've forgotten leading up to the part of the dream that i remember. the part i remember vividly is being coerced somehow to carry a gun while searching for someone specific in a park that was near the river. there were hundreds of people sitting around on blankets in the open space. i had the gun raised over my head, desperately searching when i spotted a man loading what appeared to be an automatic weapon. he began to shoot. suddenly, everything was chaos. people were screaming and running, and i heard the sounds of that horrible rifle gunning down innocents. i started running myself and somehow ended up back at a friend's apartment.
28 march 2021, monday morning i was an old, old woman. my wrinkles were like trenches. i was taking care of an old, old man who was very sick. he was bedridden and constantly coughing. i don't remember much of the dream, but i remember him asking me to kill him. i also remember agreeing. i injected him with something and watched his final smile. i remember crying. i began to aimlessly walk around the house. it was only when i examined photos hung on the walls that i realized the man was ac.
28 march 2021, monday morning i had the dream about tt again. this time i actually saw him. i watched him die. i watched them kill him. i watched the blood pool around his still warm body. i felt the tears on my face and the rope burns on my wrists as i flailed with grief. i watched the same sword pierce my stomach and saw the spurts of my blood flying through the air. i felt the cold ground on my face as my body weakened and could no longer hold itself up. i watched his cold dead eyes staring at nothing as my vision faded to black.

a catalogue of my dreams